So guys might not care about the salad, but they get really freaked out when you mention your "diet". Yes, mentioning your diet on a date is a DATE-KILLER.
When you mention your diet, even if it's offhandedly, one of two things can happen:
- They never ask you on another date ever again.
- They ask more questions.
And when the guy asks more questions about it. (However kind he may be.) You can bet that you're going to spend the majority of the date talking about what you can and can't eat.
Date: "Can you have chicken?"
You: "No. It has a lot of PHE in it."
Date: "How about turkey?"
You: "Same deal... no."
Date: "How about fish?"
You: "Still has a lot of PHE."
Date: "What about water?"
You: "Actually that I can have." (while in you mind you're thinking: Of course I can have water! You've been watching me drink it for the whole date!)
It's nice that he's interested. But while he's busy asking questions about your diet, you lose the chance to get to know each other. In his head your "the girl with the really complicated diet".
You could be using the time that you spend trying to explain your diet to find out more interesting things like: what color is his toothbrush? What's his favorite type of goat? What's his favorite cartoon? What is his closet-nerdy habit? What is his favorite crayon in those big coloring boxes? Etc...
The funny thing is, even if I know the guy pretty well. We've been friends for a LONG time, the moment we're in a date setting they suddenly want to know all the gritty detail of my diet.
It's a Date-killer.
So some good advice? Save discussing you're diet for another day. Definitely not the first date. Once you get to know him a little better, and he knows that you're not only your diet. Because the moment you're diet is mentioned... it becomes the choice topic for a long long long long time.
I just wanted to write you and say I just found your blog today through Google when I searched for PKU Awareness info. I am so proud of you for sharing all your experiences. I am also frustrated for you when I look back and see that you must not have received any comments or feedback you have asked for on repeat occasions. I feel your frustration. And I sense your sadness and loneliness as it relates to you wanting to find friends with PKU. I do not have PKU, but I have a son who does. He is only 3 1/2, and we just found out he has autism too. I have thought about his future ever since we first found out he has PKU. I am so pleased you had great parents, and it is encouraging to me to see that, as a parent. It is also encouraging to me to see you and how you have grown up and done so well with your diet. It gives me hope for my son. Thank you for your courage to share. I was also interested in knowing if you ever "cheated" on your diet for a period of time, and how you feel about temptation. That is something us parents worry about a lot! I will try to share your blog and see if you can find anyone else out there, but I don't know of anyone. We are blessed to have a family in our area who has a son with PKU the same age, and we have become good friends. I hope they will be in the future. Feel free to check out my blog, or tell your family to, as I doubt it would interest you as much! And good luck with your ventures in teaching. What a noble career choice (I am only assuming you are still doing that. If not, good luck in all your future endeavors!). :)
ReplyDeleteThank you so much! This comment really made my day. :)
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